


A Stranger In His Skin

by starrywrite



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Asexual Character, Asexual!Dan, Asexuality, Coming Out, Demisexuality, Fluff and Angst, Grey-A, Internalized Acephobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-24
Updated: 2015-06-24
Packaged: 2018-04-05 18:51:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4191057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrywrite/pseuds/starrywrite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s not that he has a problem with sex, to put it simply. He’d even go as far as saying that sex, in general, is pretty great. It can be intimate or just downright dirty, but sex is still sex and there’s nothing wrong with sex at all. But then there’s the idea of <i>him</i> having sex and that, to put it simply, is what he has a problem with. </p><p>(Or, the one where Dan is pretty sure he’s asexual, but he’s still trying to figure it out.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Stranger In His Skin

**Author's Note:**

> i guess a disclaimer is in order here! first things first, i am not dan howell and i am not claiming to know dan howell’s sexual identity/orientation - however, there’s nothing wrong with having certain headcanons (as long as they are not being presented as fact, which they are not in this fic; this is a work of fiction, after all). secondly, people who identify as asexual experience asexuality in various and different ways, and this fic addresses one of the ways that someone may experience it. and finally, asexual representation is scarce and limited to be quite honest. asexuality is not something to be “cured” by having sex or forcing someone into a sexual experience, and more people need to realize that. now, all of that being said, here is my fic! 
> 
> this fic takes place around 2009/2010 but just as a general disclaimer: this is 100% a work of fiction!!! tw: internalized acephobia, coming out, less than ideal reactions to said coming out by well-meaning people, some angst, some fluff, & an overall happy ending to a story that’s not entirely finished. also this may seem a bit… scattered, but that’s because it’s (mostly) based off of my thoughts, feelings, and experiences. this fic is extremely personal to me as this is still something i’m trying to figure out myself and what better way than to channel all of that than into the form of a fic! it was actually pretty therapeutic for me to write this and while i haven’t exactly reached a definite answer on things, i feel better about dealing with it :)

In the back of his mind, no matter how hard he’s tried to ignore it - and no matter for how long, at that - Dan knows that sex has always been a sensitive subject. It’s not that he has a problem with sex, to put it simply. He’d even go as far as saying that sex, in general, is pretty great. It can be intimate or just downright dirty, but sex is still sex and there’s nothing wrong with it at all. But then there’s the idea of _him_ having sex and that, to put it simply, is what he has a problem with. 

It’s hard for him to figure out just when he realized that he thought of sex differently than other people did; he’s already eighteen and most of his friends have either lost their virginity or at least wanted to lose it by now. And then there’s him, still a virgin - not that it’s something he brags about. When someone on Formspring asks him if he’s lost his virginity, he bullshits his answer about being in a relationship for three years and _what do you think?_ because he can’t bring himself to admit to anyone - not even himself - that he doesn’t want to have sex with his girlfriend. 

The thought of having sex hardly even crosses his mind, until his friends start asking him if he’s “getting any”, and of course he has nothing interesting to tell them. He doesn’t have any stories of wild orgasms or scratches down his back; hell, he doesn’t even have anything remotely vanilla to tell them. And he’s sure that they wouldn’t be interested in hearing about the time they cuddled on his couch while watching _Titanic_ or when she came over for dinner and they held hands under the table. They ask again when he doesn’t reply, and he chokes on the word “no,” knowing that he’s going to regret telling the truth. 

“You’re joking,” one of his friends says in disbelief. “She’s so hot, why not?”

“Mate, you’ve been with her nearly a year and the two of you haven’t done _anything_?” another asks in disbelief.

“What the hell’s wrong with you, Dan?” a third friend jokes, and that question sticks in his brain.

What _is_ wrong with him?

* * *

He wishes he wanted to have sex with his girlfriend, but the truth is he doesn’t want to - not at all. He doesn’t want her to touch him, he doesn’t want to touch her. And he thinks it’s such a goddamn travesty because she is gorgeous and lovely and she always smells nice and she wants him.

But he didn’t want her in the same way. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and hold her close and kiss her hair and the damn near entirety of their relationship was about as sexual as a made-for-TV-movie. And he was so fucking embarrassed about it, because why _wouldn’t_ he want to be with her? 

She was a beautiful girl and he didn’t even want to touch her. 

What the hell is wrong with him?

* * *

They end up breaking up for another reason entirely, and Dan thinks it’s for the best. He couldn’t give her what she wanted and maybe she wasn’t what he wanted in the first place, so maybe now he can start feeling normal.

* * *

Dan falls for Phil Lester in 2009 and there aren’t enough words in the English language to describe how he makes him feel. 

It had all felt like some strange dream come true when he and Phil started talking, because Dan had been such a fan of him and his videos for so long. It’s cheesy as hell to say it, but Dan felt so alone after breaking up with his girlfriend and parting ways with friends leaving for uni, and Phil’s videos made him feel a little bit less alone. They also served as one hell of a distraction because spending his days working and his nights watching Phil’s videos meant he didn’t have the time or energy to think about finding a way to fix himself. 

He hardly knows Phil, they’ve never met in real life and they’ve only talked a couple of times by now, but there’s something about Phil that makes him feel likes broken. Normal. And he really likes that. 

* * *

The days turn to weeks then to months, and Dan and Phil’s relationship has progressed so much that Dan is sure that Phil is going to be The One - of course by “The One”, he means the one to fix him. 

He hasn’t told Phil about his problem, about how he doesn’t want to have sex with anyone, how he doesn’t _feel_ like having sex with anyone. He can’t tell him, of course he can’t; Phil wouldn’t want anything to do with him. He wouldn’t understand why anyone would. Whenever he thinks about it, he feels a bit like a defective toy sometimes; he feels like people _know_ that there’s something not right about him, even though he hasn’t told anyone, and they all look at him with pity in their eyes. He hopes that maybe someone will get curious enough to wind him up, and then he’ll work properly. And he hates this feeling, and he hates not having answers, and he hates not understanding any of this.

That’s why he appreciates Phil’s existence so much - because he likes Phil, fuck, he really, _really_ likes Phil. And he wants to be with him. And maybe since he feels so strongly towards Phil romantically, that may stir up something inside of him and he’ll finally be past whatever it is that’s wrong with him. 

* * *

Dan and Phil have been flirting a lot lately, and Phil definitely likes him. They aren’t together and they’ve only met in real life once - although they’ve already got plans to reunite once again at the end of the month. They kissed for the first time at the train station three days ago, and all they’ve done for the entire weekend they spent together was hold hands and kiss, but the fluttery feeling in Dan’s chest and stomach hasn’t gone away.

Dan likes Phil, and he can’t stop thinking about kissing him and cuddling with him and holding his hand. Sometimes he thinks about having sex with him. Not often, and when he does those thoughts are rare and fleeting, but sometimes. 

(‘Sometimes’ doesn’t feel like enough. ‘Sometimes’ doesn’t feel normal.)

* * * 

Dan can’t deny that he’s been feeling a bit off lately. During the day, he’s fine, but at night when he gets into bed and tries to go to sleep, he inevitably ends up thinking way too much. Instead this feeling of ‘I don’t know what’s wrong but I don’t think I’m fine’ tugs at his chest and makes his stomach turn. He isn’t sure what it is, but there’s just something nagging at him in the back of his mind - and it’s damn persistent at that. 

He and Phil have spent another weekend together and, once again, they spent an entire three days together holding hands and kissing. Sometimes Phil kisses his knuckles, sometimes Phil kisses his cheek, sometimes Phil kisses his lips. Dan loves Phil’s kisses, he loves everything about the feeling of his soft lips pressed against his warm skin; he couldn’t forget that feeling if he tried. It’s been hours since their last kiss, and Dan still can’t stop replaying it in his mind. 

Sometimes when he thinks of he and Phil together, he imagines them what it’d be like to do a little more than just kiss. Sometimes he thinks about Phil’s hand caressing his thigh, moving up and down his leg in a soothing fashion. Sometimes he thinks about he and Phil lying in his bed, him on top of Phil while they kiss with Phil’s hands on his ass, holding him close. Sometimes he that’s all he _can_ think about, because even the Dan in his imagination doesn’t want to have sex. 

He tries to think about himself having sex in hypothetical situations, but even in his mind - where everything is one hundred percent fictional - he can only take it so far before he starts to feel uneasy. He thanks his lucky stars that Phil never instigates sexting, because he can’t say sexual things without imagining them actually happening, and he gets mildly uncomfortable. But every now and again, Phil will tack on a winky face at the end of a text or say something even the slightest bit suggestive, and he doesn’t know how to feel about it. But he knows he doesn’t feel good about it. 

He wants Phil and he wants to be with Phil - or maybe he just wants to want to be with Phil. Maybe he just wants to be able to reciprocate these feelings that he doesn’t feel. Maybe he just wants to feel good about having sex. Maybe he just wants to have sex, period. But he doesn’t. He doesn’t at all. And it’s scary. It’s so fucking scary suddenly feeling like he doesn’t have a grip on who he is and not being able to understand why he feels this way. 

* * *

He’s heard of the word ‘asexual’ before, but he never thought of it as something that would describe him. 

When people talk about asexuals, he’s heard them say that they’re broken or weird, and there’s always such a heavy implication that something is wrong with them or that the way they feel isn’t valid. When people talk about asexuals, he’s heard them say that they don’t belong in the LGBT community. He’s heard people call them “special snowflakes”, and say that they’re extremely childish or robotic. He’s read stories of people coming out as asexual and being told that they have a hormone imbalance, or that they just haven’t found the right person, or that they’ll change their minds later in life, or that they simply can’t be asexual because they’ve never had sex in the first place. 

When he thinks about it, Dan realizes that he hasn’t heard a positive thing about asexuals at all. And that is making the thought of him being asexual even more terrifying to him. It’s making him not want to _be_ asexual, period.

As soon as he thinks ‘what if I am asexual?’, he pushes the thought to the farthest and darkest corner of the back of his mind. He can’t be asexual, of course he can’t. He’s thought about himself having sex with people before, he’s kissed and touched people before, he and Phil have talking about being intimate before. He _can’t_ be asexual, he just can’t be. There is absolutely no way he could be asexual. 

* * *

He takes his questions to Tumblr – naturally – and that’s either a brilliant idea or a horrible one. He isn’t too sure at first. And after silently snooping through a few blogs and some tags, he still hasn’t really come to any conclusions. He’s read some funny text posts - _“do you ever see something and go ‘I’m too asexual for this’”_ \- and one that really made his eyes widen - _“I probably should have realized I was asexual when I skipped smut in all the fanfiction I read to that I could get to the good part where they cuddled and held hands”_.

He finds an interesting analogy - _“Being asexual is like being born without a sense of smell but everywhere you go people are spraying perfume in your face and when you ask them to stop and tell them it’s irritating and you can’t smell the perfume anyway they get huffy and respond with “Don’t lie to me; I can clearly see you have a nose. Everybody has a nose therefore everybody smells things and besides maybe you just haven’t found the right scent yet.” and then you want to scream”_ \- that makes his heart start to beat faster because these posts are starting to hit a little closer to him than he’d like.

And then he stumbles across one post that damn near makes him cry.

 _“Never, ever assume asexuals have it easy._  
_Asexuality is growing up under the assumption you are a late bloomer, and then the assumption you are broken._  
_Asexuality is learning the word and still being afraid to define yourself as asexual because how can you say you don’t feel something you don’t even understand.”_

It goes on after that, but he keeps reading _how can you say you don’t feel something you don’t understand_ over and over again until he feels tears welling up in his eyes because _fuck_. 

He can’t read anymore after that because everything hurts and there’s something rupturing in his chest that he’s never felt before, but at the same time feels oddly familiar, and it just becomes another thing about himself that he doesn’t understand. He slams his laptop shut in frustration and presses his palms to his eyes, taking a deep but shaky breath. He can’t be asexual - he doesn’t _want_ to be asexual. He just wants to be fucking _normal_. 

* * * 

A few hours later, after he’s calmed down, he revisits the internet. He googles “am I asexual?” and even though his instincts are telling him it’s not the best idea, he winds up taking about three different online quizzes about asexuality. And all of the answers point to the same solution: grey-asexuality. 

Confusion is Dan’s best friend tonight because he hadn’t even heard of grey-asexuality before and he has absolutely no idea what it is. But he’s determined to find some answers, so he takes is confusion back to the internet and he does a Google search. 

_The ace umbrella encompasses asexuals, as well as people in this grey area. Some people, known as “grey-asexuals”, experience sexual attraction infrequently or not very strongly or possibly aren't quite sure whether or not what they experience is sexual attraction._

He blinks slowly, and bites his lip as he clicks on a link, feeling a strange dip in his stomach, almost as if he’s doing something he shouldn’t be. But he’s determined to get some answers tonight because he can’t cope with this confusion and frustration anymore. So he keeps on reading. He reads that grey-asexuals sometimes experience sexual attraction, not normally but it does happen - which is exactly how he feels sometimes. He reads that grey-asexuals can experience sexual attraction but have a low sex drive - which is exactly how he feels sometimes. He reads that grey-asexuals can experience sexal attraction and drive, but don’t necessarily want to act on it - which is exactly how he feels sometimes. He reads that grey-asexuals can enjoy and desire sex, but only under specific circumstances - which is exactly how he feels sometimes. 

As he reads, he feels as though the weight resting in his chest is becoming lighter and lighter, and he feels like he can actually breathe again. He feels _okay_. And in an odd way, he feels normal; he feels like this is his new normal. 

His search on grey-asexualty then becomes a search on demisexuality - _a sexual orientation in which someone feels sexual attraction only to people with whom they have an emotional bond_ \- and even as he reads that, he feels at home within the sentences that fill his laptop screen. It’s almost as if this term was created just for him because everything he reads feels all too familiar in a way that he can’t explain, and even more importantly, it all feels so accurate. He feels as though he’s entered a world he didn’t even know existed before. He had no idea that there were so many branches of sexual orientation that went beyond the parts of the LGBT community that everyone knew about. He had no idea that there were so many people who were going through the same thing he was. 

He spends about two hours reading about grey-asexuality and demisexuality; he clicks on every link he sees, he reads every article he can find, he browses through the tags on Tumblr and likes damn near everything. Whenever he sees something that makes him go “Yes! That is _me_!” he feels his start race in his chest, but for once, it’s in a good way. 

He doesn’t realize it when he starts to cry, and this time, he isn’t crying _because_ he’s asexual. He’s crying because he finally has _an answer_. And he’s still confused and afraid and frustrated, but he still feels so fucking relieved and it’s a start. Oh god, it’s a start. 

* * * 

He tells Phil the next day because it’s absolutely eating at him and he can’t keep this to himself any longer. 

Phil calls him, just like he always does, and they chat for a few minutes before Dan just blurts out, “I think I’m asexual.” 

His face goes positively crimson when Phil doesn’t say anything right away, and his heart hammers harder than it ever has before. _“You’re - oh, okay,”_ Phil says slowly and Dan wants to vomit. _“Uh, what does - can I ask what that means?”_

Dan chews on his bottom lip. “It, uh, it basically means I don’t - I don’t want to have sex,” he says slowly. “I - I mean, I _can_ have sex, like my - it’s not broken or anything. Nothing’s broken -” 

_“Of course you’re not broken,”_ Phil cuts in quickly and Dan nearly starts to cry. 

“Yeah,” he says softly. “I’m not broken. I’m just - I don’t necessarily feel sexual attraction. It’s not - it’s not your fault,” he stutters nervously. “It has nothing to do with you, you’re - it’s just me, and it’s about what I feel - or what I don’t feel, I guess.” 

_“Okay,”_ Phil says, and then he says, _“Okay,”_ again, as if he’s trying to process everything. 

Dan sighs a little. “I’m probably not making any sense,” he says. “I’m - I’m sorry, I’m still trying to make sense of it myself.” 

_“You don’t have to apologize,”_ Phil tells him. _“I’m sure this is all really confusing for you.”_

“Yeah, it is,” Dan sighs again, and he closes his eyes and rubs his temple with his free hand. “I just - I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore,” he whispers. 

_“You’re Dan,”_ Phil tells him. _“You’re always going to be Dan.”_

Dan shuts his eyes tightly, because he swears he’s going to cry at this rate. “Thank you,” he croaks softly, and he takes a deep breath before he continues talking. “So, uh, yeah. I’m - I’m asexual. Well, I guess maybe grey-asexual - that’s a thing you know, it’s like a branch of asexuality.” He pauses, then hesitates before murmuring, “Or maybe I’m demisexual. Or maybe I’m -” 

_“Maybe you’re confused?”_ Phil suggests and Dan wishes his heart hadn’t plummeted the slightest bit, but it does. He wasn’t exactly expecting Phil to completely understand what he was talking about but he couldn’t help but to hope that he would react in a less predictable way. _“It’s just, you sound really confused about things right now. Maybe you just need some time to figure things out a little bit more, and then - well, who knows? You could end up changing your mind about how you feel about sex.”_

“Yeah?” Dan says softly. “Yeah, maybe - maybe that’s it. That’s probably it.” he agrees, because Phil _does_ have a point; he is confused as hell right now, even though he’s sought out some answers, that doesn’t mean all of his problems are solved. But there’s a part of Dan, deep down, that knows he’s not confused at all. 

* * * 

Everything’s happening so fast but at the same time, it feels like nothing is happening at all. 

Phil knows he’s ace, but nothing’s necessarily changed. Phil doesn’t talk to him differently or look at him like he’s a defective toy. He doesn’t try to wind him up to see if he’ll go. He doesn’t treat him like anything other than Dan. Maybe because he’s _still_ Dan, he’s just discovered something about himself that he didn’t know before. Maybe because nothing’s really changed at all. 

Yet Dan feels as though there’s a weight lifted off of his shoulders and even though only one person knows right now, it’s all he needs. Just saying the words out loud for the first time felt like the horrific burden placed upon his shoulders had been lifted. The one thing that had been consuming him, that had becoming the only thing he could think about, now felt like something he could actually deal with. However despite that, everything still feels the same. It doesn’t appear like anything’s changed at all, but Dan knows that it has. 

And most importantly, there’s one thing that definitely changed and that is that he’s admitted his greatest secret to the most important person he could’ve told: himself. 

* * * 

Sometimes Phil asks him about sex. They don’t necessarily sext, just talk in hypothetical situations about what they want to do to each other. Sometimes Dan cries because it’s all so overwhelming and he doesn’t want to be touched at all. He tells Phil he’s sorry for being broken and boring, and Phil tells him right away that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with him for not wanting sex. 

Dan’s slowly starting to believe him. 

* * * 

About a month later, one of his friends comes out as asexual. It’s unexpected to say the least, and a bit ironic how that ends up happening right as he’s trying to figure the same things out himself. Even though he knows there are other asexuals out there, despite them only making up one percent of the British population – which sounds like not very many people, but it actually adds up to a hell of a lot. And he actually knows one of them. 

She comes out via Tumblr where she makes a post and right off the bat she says the words, “I’m asexual.” 

Dan’s heart nearly leaps out of his chest and he can’t fight the smile on his face as he reads her story that feel so familiar to his own. She comes out as grey-asexual and demisexual, the two sexualities that Dan feels most comfortable identifying with and it’s actually pretty scary how all of this is working out – how just as he’s struggling with his own sexuality, someone he knows comes out. It’s funny the way these things work out, and maybe it all means something and maybe it means nothing, but he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t the happiest he’s been in months as he reads her coming out post. 

_this may change in the future and I’m completely open to that, but if it doesn’t, then I’m definitely okay with that too. right now I‘m comfortable with who I am and I’m just very happy about that._

Holy shit. 

Dan nearly starts tearing up as he reads her coming out because he’s just so _happy_. He’s so happy for her and he’s happy that figured this out because sexuality is so fucking confusing and scary, and she’s found answers for herself and she’s happy and god, that makes him so happy. And he’s happy for himself, because he knows he’s not alone. There are other people out there who know what he’s going through, who asked themselves the same questions that he’s currently asking himself, who understand. There are other people out there who identify as what he thinks he may identify as and there are people out there who are just like him. 

He texts her after he re-reads her post and tells her how proud he is of her, and then he reads her coming out post over and over again. And as he reads it for the umpteenth time, he can’t help but to feel so damn comforted as he reads it because _wow_. He really isn’t alone. 

* * * 

Months go by and Dan still doesn’t have any concrete answers. Sex is still a sensitive subject. It still makes him uncomfortable to think about sometimes, but sometimes he’s completely fine with the idea of sex – specifically the idea of sex with Phil, who becomes his ‘official’ boyfriend - despite the fact that they were basically together by now; it becomes ‘official’ when Phil asks him to _be_ his boyfriend, something Dan had wanted to ask him for ages now but was too afraid to because why would Phil want to date _him_ when he can date someone normal, someone who wants to have sex? - _finally_ after nearly a year of flirting and infatuation. But most of the time, it’s just not something he worries about anymore. Because he knows who he is, he’s asexual. And he’s still Dan regardless. 

* * * 

He’s scared shitless when he and Phil start dating because Phil is very sex positive and most of the time, Dan is pretty sex repulsed. And he finds himself worrying more and more when he starts having sleepovers at Phil’s flat instead of studying in his dorm, because it’s only a matter of time before Phil wants something more than Dan can offer. 

It isn’t until Phil clears a drawer for him at his flat when Dan brings the subject again. 

“So,” he starts slowly. “Are – are you okay with this? With me, I mean?” 

Phil raises an eyebrow. “What do you mean?” he asks. 

Dan exhales slowly, and for a moment, he doesn’t say anything. Anxiety eats away at his chest and gnaws in the pit of his stomach and he whispers softly, “I think I’m asexual.” 

Right away Phil says, “That’s okay,” and Dan’s head snaps up he just about gives himself whiplash. Phil takes his hands and he says again, “It’s okay, Dan. It’s not going to change _anything_ between us, I promise.” 

“You – we’re – I –“ is all Dan can choke out because he’s so filled to the brim with emotion, and he wants to grab Phil and kiss him, and he wants to cry, but all he can do is stand there with his mouth agape. 

“Dan, I like you,” Phil tells him. “You’re my boyfriend and I like you exactly the way you are, I like everything that makes you _you_.” 

“I don’t know if this is a phase, Phil,” he whispers. “Sex is still weird and confusing for me, and sometimes I want it but sometimes I don’t and –“ 

“I’ll do my research,” Phil interrupts gently. “I’ll get pamphlets and I’ll read about asexuality as much as I can about all of this. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable at all so if I ever take things too far in any way, just let me know and we can talk about it – or we don’t have to, but I just want us to be on the same page, always. ” Dan finds himself speechless, completely and utterly speechless, and Phil squeezes his hands tightly in his own and says, “I just want you to know that no matter what, you’re still going to be my boyfriend and I’m still going to like you so, so much. Sex isn’t a deal breaker Dan; it’s not going to make or break our relationship in any way. If you don’t want to have sex then we don’t have to, period. It doesn’t matter to me, but what matters to me more than anything is you and you being happy and comfortable when we’re together all of the time.” 

Tears well up in Dan’s eyes and he swallows hard before he’s able to whisper, “Thank you,” and his voice cracks a little and it makes him blush like crazy, but Phil just grins and pulls him into a tight hug. Dan buries his face against his chest and closes his eyes tightly, a single tear rolling down his cheek. “God – thank you,” he whispers again. Phil rubs his back sweetly and Dan exhales shakily because he’s just so full of emotion right now. 

It wasn’t that he _needed_ validation from Phil - or from anyone, for that matter - but just knowing that nothing was going to change because of this is just so damn refreshing and relieving. Knowing that the person he loves and cares about the most still loves and cares about him, even though it feels like there are parts of him that are broken. Knowing that his and Phil’s relationship isn’t going to be compromised because of their lack of sex life, knowing that he doesn’t feel like he _has_ to have sex to be with Phil. Everything just feels so damn good now, and Dan hasn’t been able to say that for months. 

He’s still confused, no doubt about that. Sexuality is confusing as fuck and he’s still trying to learn more about himself throughout this process of discovery. And some days, he’s sex positive and wants Phil to touch him in ways he’s never been touched before. Some days, he’s very sex negative and the very thought of being intimate makes him cringe. And most days he’s just very neutral about sex, it’s all very fluid and nothing is ever concrete, but he’s still asexual. No one can tell him that he isn’t but himself, and after months and months of fear and denial, he can finally admit it to himself. He’s asexual. And Dan’s story is just beginning.

**Author's Note:**

> and another disclaimer!! all of the text posts i referenced in this fic are not of my own! they are all credited to their original owners!
> 
> and also bc i feel like a lot of you are going to ask lol MAYBE/EVENTUALLY there will be a 'part two' or a continuation of my ace!Dan verse - however, since this fic was based off of my life and my circumstances, i won't be writing more until i have more to say :) right now, the fic ends perfectly in line with my life but one day i hope to add more to it ^_^


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